Bring on the stretchy pants!

I'm not obnoxious enough to say that I am fat. I mean, I'm certainly not as skinny as me circa 1994, but I'm definitely not fat. More like "star bellied sneech" shaped. In general I ignore the fat belly - I did grow three humans in there for God's sake! Occasionally, however, it sneaks up on me and I have one of THOSE days. Yesterday was that day. I felt fat...really fat...and ugly. I was wearing jeans which have become increasingly less flattering and increasingly more ill-fitting on me. Seriously, when did we decide this was a good comfortable look? So all day long I talked about how I was wearing nothing but stretchy pants from now on. Then, just as my self -loathing was just about to reach its maximum for the day I walked my last kid out to his mother. I had met this mother on occasion but usually the dad brings the kid. Mom looks up at me and says "What happened to your face?"

This is not new for me. I am no stranger to the looks, whispers or occasional "Gee, do you mind me asking..." But SERIOUSLY!!! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE????? This was a grown woman! In general I don't mind questions..I actually welcome them. My birth defect helps define me...It helps make me who I am...but SERIOUSLY!!! It took all the restraint in the world for me not to say "What happened to YOUR face lady?" But, I didn't, I smiled and gave her the same answer I give a 5 year old - "I was born this way." She, of course, was unsatisfied with this answer and continued with the rudeness- "So, you didn't have an accident?" "Did you have stitches?" "Did it hurt?" SERIOUSLY!!!!

So, I immediately ran out to Old Navy and stocked up on stretchy pants. This, of course, does nothing for my face but certainly makes me feel better about my fat ass.



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